The boss of me

There are times (and these weeks appear to be such times) when I don't feel like I am fit for running a lab at all. Usually it is because I have way too much stuff to do (teaching, grading, traveling, sitting in meetings, fighting administration) - stuff that my lab doesn't benefit from and either doesn't know goes on or thinks is taking too much of my time.

And now, the week before I take a much needed break, I finally have some time to catch up with some science for a change and I find that projects are not running smoothly, some people don't do what I thought we had agreed on, while others depend on the results and are now freaking out, which makes me freak out. On top of that, I find that I am intimidated by my own postdoc, who always has a reply to no matter what I say and who sometimes makes me feel like I am stupid and incapable. And who has too much work on their plate, and therefore not yet finished any of it, but who refuses help and support whenever I offer. I think I need to manage this more and be more strict about who does what and what data belong to whom, but I don't have the will nor the energy.

I am so freaking tired.

1 opmerking:

  1. Ugh on the postdoc who is disrespectful/always talks back. I have had a student or a postdoc like that on occasion and it sucks for everyone involved. Usually I will eventually have a conversation like "It looks like you don't respect me and don't think you have anything to learn from me. Therefore, this group is not a good choice for you, because you should be working with someone whom you respect and want to learn from. Thoughts?" Usually they get all defensive and backpedal and we set up firmer rules of communication.
    The thing is, maybe this person is god's gift to science, but you are in your job for a reason. If you avoid him, which I would if every interaction were like pulling teeth, then he doesn't get the benefit of your expertise (not to mention annoy you).
    Good luck!